Tuesday, January 4, 2011

raising teenagers

dear emily,

i have touched briefly, because NO one wants to spend much
time here, on the teenage years.   when my crew were little,
people used to say, "oh, enjoy them while they're so precious.
when they turn 13, you won't like them anymore."

how terrifying is that?  and untrue . . . mostly.

if you have established a foundation of respect and love with
your youngsters, you will survive their rough patches at 15.   if,
however, you allow disrespectful, selfish behavior when they are
young and compliant, they will most likely turn into two-headed
monsters.  at this point, you will be forced to hire an exorcist.

google images


just kidding . . . mostly.  

so, the moral of the story is to plan for the future.  you cannot
control the unfolding events , but your relationship with your
future teenager begins right now.

1.  from the age of two, your child should be able to look you
     in the eye when you speak to him.

2.  there is no need to yell at him.  speak as respectfully to him,
     as you would your husband.   (ahem, are you speaking
     respectfully to your husband?)

3.  do NOT ask your toddler to do anything, unless you are
     willing to back up the request.   if you let these requests
      slip by without response,  your darling will quickly tune
      you out.

4.  spend more time snuggling, reading, and playing, than
      bossing and disciplining.  "all work and no play, makes
      mom a big BORE."

5.  keep pappy, happy.

this is just the beginning, and after much prayer and reflection,
i have lots more to share.

love,
lea

"so in everything, do to others what you would have them do
to you, for this sums up the law and the prophets."  mt. 7:12